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Computer Fast Reflections

April 7, 2010

I mentioned here that I was planning on taking a computer fast during the weeks preceding Easter.  Since Easter has come and gone, I figured it was time for an update. I must say, it was much, much harder than I thought it would be.

I had much gusto the first week or two. I wrote down the recipes I needed the night before and recorded the things I needed to look up later in the day when I thought of them. The computer sat idly in its spot on top of the  TV until Maddie went to bed. After those first few weeks, I would take sneak peaks during the day if I needed something quick, then put the computer back without a second glance. After that the bottom dropped out. First thing in the morning I would take a “quick peak,” then discover an hour had flown by. I rarely spent time in prayer, chores were still neglected, and Maddie spent more time in front of the TV than I care to admit.

Here’s what I learned over the course of this journey:

I discovered just how hard it was avoiding quick hops on the computer to check something out. So many times during the day I would think of a recipe I wanted to look up, a pattern I wanted to knit, or something like that, and then I would remember that I shouldn’t be on the computer. Sometimes I would write it down for later, but more often than not I would cave. Also, I found when I wasn’t on the computer, I compensated by spending more time watching TV or trying to knit (hard to do with an active 18-month-0ld!). Basically, I was substituting one distraction for another. I still neglected chores and quiet time. And unfortunately, there were many times I pushed Maddie away for “me” time.

So, in other words, my fast has been an epic failure. I went in with lots of good intentions. I wanted to spend more time in prayer, more time with Maddie, and more time serving my husband with good food and a clean house. However, the time went progressively downhill until I wasn’t even trying to stay off the computer during the day. I’ve discovered how little self-control I actually have, and how much time I allocate during the day doing mindless things. I get so me focused that I put my priorities in the wrong place. I want to put Christ first and me second, but I can’t do it on my own.

Going forward, I plan on at least trying to stay off the computer during the day, even though it wouldn’t be so much of a commitment as the weeks before. I hope to spend more time in the Word and prayer, and then after that I hope the rest will fall into place.

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